Commitment versus Attachment

While pondering upon how I will approach my Instagram Live today, my thought process took me to word ‘attachment’.  There is a sure shot link between the two, and yet I felt something was amiss. I realized that Commitment is a journey which one undertakes consciously. You cannot commit to something by fluke. It is a mindful decision that one takes.

This brings me to my second thought (I certainly do have a lot of thoughts), the concept of ownership. Commitment enables ownership.  Once a person gets into a mode of commitment that they are making, they tend to take responsibility for action and work to rectify errors instead of staying with it. This is how commitment is different from attachment. Attachment makes you fret over every mistake, every error and every slip-up. It holds you back. Commitment helps you move forward

Commitment makes life effortless whereas attachment is painful.  It is not to suggest that commitment journey will not have its ups and downs but since it’s such a forward-looking journey, one doesn’t get stuck. Attachment makes it difficult to move.

Commitment is inward and attachment is outward- One tends to look outward for attachment, a thing, a place, a person, an emotion, a memory, anything. Commitment is inward, it doesn’t need a reason. It is to the moment.

The question then arises, is one possible without another. Can you commit without being attached? Or can you get attached without committing?

I came across ‘Three the component model of Commitment’ developed by John Meyers and Natalie Allen. They speak, in organizational context  three kinds of commitment – Affective Commitment (developing affection), Continuance commitment (need-based commitment- out of compulsion)  and normative commitment( Need-based- out of guilt)

Our life is also like that. Being committed because of attachment is continuance or normative commitment. One is stuck with it because of guilt or fear. None of these reasons are healthy. Only when one develops an affection or conviction does commitment work.

Coming to the second question- Is attachment possible without commitment? Attachment is our second nature. We need to be attached to sustain. However, despite the difference, it is difficult to view one without another. The only way out is to realize when one is falling into the trap of attachment. Make commitment your strength, not attachment.